Bar Mixvah (A Kosher Bar Mix)

I married into a Jewish family, and the first event I ever attended with them was my husband’s nephew’s bar mitzvah. I was nervous. I wanted to make a good impression. I spent the entire reception standing next to the snack table, partly out of shyness and partly because someone had put out a bowl of bagel chips and I lost all self-control.

Years later, when it was our own son’s turn, I knew I wanted to bring something homemade. My mother-in-law suggested I “just order a platter,” which is her way of saying she loves me. Instead I went into the kitchen and made a big, salty, crunchy bar mix out of everything I loved from that first party: pretzels, bagel chips, cashews, almonds and those little sesame sticks.

To keep it pareve, so it works with any menu, I toss everything in olive oil and a little honey instead of butter, then shake on everything bagel seasoning and plenty of kosher salt. It bakes low and slow for an hour, and the whole house smells like a deli. My father-in-law hovered by the oven like it owed him money.

It was gone before the hora. Now I make it for Hanukkah, for Super Bowl Sunday, for long car trips, and once, honestly, for a Tuesday. The snack table is my love language.